‘Cause I’ve known lonesome things you can’t come back from’

“Don’t waste your time on me you’re already the voice inside my head”

So it’s 2016 officially and man oh man did 2o15 end with a bang! Like holy shit though it is seriously the year 2016. There has been another year under my belt that has slid by without much notice other than the fact that for the most everything is the same. I did make a job change this year however, but I am not sure that’s how you define whether or not its been a good year.  It was a big change for me. I went from a smaller organization within the IT field to one that I have an opportunity to really excel at.  I been given a helluva opportunity here. I love the new folk I work with and I like where their minds are at as far as we as an IT organization goes.  That is just the small talk within this blog about 2015 however. It was so much more than that! Just a couple things that come to head is the hatred and judgment in the world today, the false hope that thy neighbor is good, because they really are. The fact that so many people have given up on what they believe in. I stand before you and tell you that I believe in people. I believe in people that care and love for one another and for whatever reason life has finally paid me back for it.  I’ve spent a good chunk of my 20’s just winging it. It turns out, it was actually a helluva time. Matter of fact it was the best of times. These were some of the moments that have defined me for who I am today.

So what exactly did I find out about myself in my 20’s? I suppose that’s a fair question. My name is Jason. I am a Scorpio from the 8th day of November. I am extremely loyal and passionate about the things I love dearly. I am very observant of my surroundings. Like…I get it by now, not everyone is as cool as a Scorpio 🙂 ! So what exactly did take place in my 20’s? I can only look back and be thankful at this point. It has taught me much. I found out that College is important, but it’s not important enough to go to right out of High School if you haven’t got a clue as to what you want to do. I found out that young love hurts cause we don’t know any better. I found out that money doesn’t grow on trees, but you can “find” a lot of money if you work hard enough by pouring concrete and striping at Oglesby Construction. I found out that unfortunately it doesn’t matter how much you love someone even their time must come (RIP Grandpa). I was able to locate that place people speak of..I think they call it “Rock Bottom” yeah I found it..it’s unpleasant. I found out that life doesn’t stop rolling because you’ve failed. I found out the only way to succeed is to drop any and everything around you so you can solely focus on the task at hand. I found out sometimes you have to leave and forget about the things you care most about in order to find yourself. I found you you have to seek bigger risk to reap bigger rewards. I found out that “true” friendships are seriously diamonds in the rough, keep those folk close. I found out that by letting down your guards you can find love. I found out that loving people in general is much easier than hating. I found that those trips you took with your buddies at the age of 23 CANNOT be duplicated at the age of 28, they’ll bring new memories within themselves. I found out that the people you once cared a lot for don’t necessarily care for you anymore, it’ll be fine. I found out that I have a heart much bigger than most people I know…I think I get that from my Father. I found out regardless of what we’ve been through and what you’ve done to me i’ll still stand by your side. I’ve found out that “United We Stand, Divided We Fall” applies to many aspects of life. I found out that a “Guys” trip should always remain a “guys” trip. I found out that many men lose their testicles as soon as they get married (I’ll be nice and not name any).  I found out that your predictions of friends throughout your 20’s can change rapidly. I found out that friends change even if you try your hardest to keep them the same. I’ve met some amazing people from all over the world, which includes countries such as Brazil, Columbia, Taiwan, Germany, Ukraine and Turkey. I’ve found out the true power of corporate corruption.  I’ve found out that I am no longer able to eat pizza 3 nights in a row without my pants feeling tighter upon the next work day. I finally found out that a dollar bill doesn’t do a god damn thing for you in this world. I found out that a broken household growing up only makes your love stronger with your siblings throughout the years ( I love you Hannah and Heather). I found that no matter how many miles your Mother may live from you she’s still your Mother and the love for her cannot falter. I’ve found out that just because their considered family doesn’t necessarily mean they’ll continue being family. I found out that friends you love dearly are more applicable family members than some of those bearing your same last name. I’ve seen some loved ones move on to the next step of their lives. I’ve had the opportunity to be in 6 weddings. I have witnessed death at CPR’s end. I have brought back life from administering CPR.  I’ve experienced the fact that money isn’t everything, the value of family and friendship has shown me this. I’ve realized what used to be isn’t necessarily what is going to be. I’ve realized you can’t bring back the past no matter how much you are upset with the current. I’ve learned that alcohol can get you into some trouble. I’ve also learned that a smile can start a domino effect. I’ve learned that “You get what you put in and people get what they deserve”, it’s called Karma and she is alive and well. I’ve learned you have to move on in order to move forward and yes I understand that is as simplistic as it gets, but prove it wrong. I’ve figured out in my past 30 years the necessities to keep me moving along for my next 30 is everything I’ve previously done….wing it. That’s all we’ve been doing our entire life. I will only continue to grow and learn and “winging it” will get easier as time passes. I’ve learned that years 20-30 move by quickly. I’ve learned to never count a time with family and friends pointless,  because there is so many memories from the lamest of times. I’ve learned that at age 30 my Mother and Father are still very wise and can offer very good advice. I’ve learned that time flies by…it doesn’t stop for you nor me. It doesn’t care about your troubles, your worries. It does not give a shit if your having a hard time nor your wish upon the stars…it just keeps moving…much like a river. You can throw your pebbles and stones in it all you want and they’ll create temporary ripples and in a flash they’ll be gone…very much like your problems in this life. #FloatOnWorld

These are just some of the things I found out during my 20’s…there is so much more to tell and still shit ton I haven’t even uncovered yet.

I feel lighter just from writing this blog. Let me know what you guys think.

Remember these are the words of me, the words of I, and the words of everything I previously have known.

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-Mess

 

 

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